Modest Proposal

Racism is tearing this country and many other countries apart. It has created genocide, widespread hate, and many other problems. Often racism can dictate people lives for the worse. As President of the Department of Racial Injustice Relocation Organization (DRIRO) I believe if we put a stop to racism then it will be much easier to solve the other problems of the world. So I have created a plan to put an end to racism as we know it.

            We plan to install video cameras in everyone’s household. Don’t worry we are not invading your privacy. We just want to see if people are being racist in their households. First time offenders will be upgraded to a head camera. They will be forced to walk around with a camera on their head for a 1 year period. After the 1 year period of good behavior they will go back to the house cam. But in the instance that someone continues to be racist with the head cam they will be sent to a corresponding country where they will work as slave. For example, a white supremacist would be sent to Niger, Africa to harvest bananas and clean feces for a local primate reservation. This was chosen because we figured the ropes of KKK members are perfect for carrying bananas. If you had a problem with Jewish people you would live in Israel as a sheep herder. In addition you will have a bar/bat mitzvah, and only be allowed to eat kosher. Because of the religious ignorance displayed by these people they will take weekly trips to Jerusalem. If you hate Asians you will be relocated to North Korea where you will be an equal with all the other Asians. Once they are in North Korea the DRIRO will have no control over what will happen to them. But I personally guarantee that they will be treated like crap while serving as a Asian slave. If you are a person that hates Latinos we are sending you to Columbia. You will work long hard hours as a slave for a drug cartel.

            We take a lot of pride in our work and believe with the right people behind it our plans will go great. Once these people are relocated the world will be a better place.

Literary Devices

Black comedy- "Infant's flesh will be in season throughout the year"

Absurdity- "The constant breeders, besides the gain of eight shillings startling per annum by the sale of their children,"

Blue Humor-"We should soon see an honest emulation among the married women, which of them could bring the fattest child to the market"

Thesis Statement-  In this tale of absurd theories in A Modest Proposal, Jonathan Swift utilizes subtle black comedy, constructive absurdity, and descriptive blue humor to resolve the problems of overpopulation.

Kiss and Tell Paragraph

     In this embarrassing tale of how a daughter's date is ruined by her parents in Kiss and Tell, Alain de Botton uses subtle characterization to convey the theme of humor. Isabelle finds herself trying to explain her parents situation to her boyfriend. In the process we learn about the humorous relationship they share. It is evident when shes says "This is prime argument territory for them, Mum will be asking Dad where he put the car park ticket and he'll get flustered because he'll just have dropped it into a bin by mistake", that her and her mother have little respect for her father. As the story progresses you realize the type of people her parents are. When her mother says, "Oh, well, it's very nice, pity you don't have the cleavage for it, but that's your father's fault", it shows that she is an extroverted person. Again it shows disrespect toward the father because usually the cleavage of a girl would not be linked to her father, but since the mother knows she will receive no resistance from the father with this statement she says it anyway. Lastly, when the father tries to defend his daughter from embarrassment in front of her boyfriend, "Don't mind her, bean, she's had a hard day", he is quickly shut down by his wife, "My day would be fine if I wasn't lumbered with someone who kept losing tickets to the car park". He submits to her once again and shows he really has no control over the relationship. 

Naked Lunch

In a story of a abusive relationship in Naked Lunch, Micheal Hollinger uses fresh allegory, descriptive characterization, and incipient irony to convey humor.